maudy's journal

Gloomy

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Sun, 5 Sep 2010 14:19:18 -0400

I am going down on slope of a mountain if I have to describe my feeling now. The whole moving things and school busyness are too overwhelming. We have moved our most major stuffs from the old house to this new apartment. Last night was our first night staying at our new apartment. There are still a lot of stuffs that are still at the old house waiting until we get shelfs to put them on. Since the church, our old house is about five minutes away, we can load our stuffs several times a day. Everytime I go there, my feeling fills with gloom and my eyes fills with tears. Part of me doesn't want to move - and no one asks us to move. But, the other part assures me that we are doing the right thing. I have mixed feeling, really want someone from the church to tell us that we are really doing the right thing.

As my head was busy justifying a lot of things, I was reminded of the feeling when I entered college. Hubby just moved to the US without promise when he could call or contact me. I also just moved to a new city, living by myself far from my parents. Everytime I went home and then back to my collegetown through an unpleasantly long trip, there was always this same feeling. Feeling of not doing the right thing. My path became clearer after several years.

I think I just need more time.

First Two Days

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 21:08:00 -0400

The enjoyable summer break had come to and end. We ended our long school break with having a road trip to East Coast. What a wonderful ending! We got back from our trip on Monday. we knew we didn't have much time to recover after the trip, but it also didn't leave much space for post-holiday syndrome. Like usual, all our bag was still unpacked while we are waiting for some energy to do laundry.

My first day was as tiring as it could be. Hubby had been wanting to take pilates class. I wasn't that interested, since the class was at 6:45 in the morning. I drag my feet, had my morning grumble walking to Mighty-our black car. We got to the gym and found out that all participated in the class were ladies, but hubby joined the class anyway. Entering the class, we were clueless. The class already started, all were lying on their back on a mattress so the instructor didn't even see us coming.

We didn't know we had to have a mattress, but then we found a stack of mattress for people who didn't bring their own. We laid our mattress then followed the rest of the class. I thought it was easy. Then I changed my mind. The movement was so gentle yet it was tiring. I am still feeling sore all over my body. I am out of shape indeed! Since that was my first day, hubby took me home after pilates class so I can take shower. For next week, I am planning on taking shower at the gym so hubby doesn't have to take extra trip.

My studio started at 1:25 pm but I attended department's welcome-lunch at noon. Eventhough it was our first day, my professor didn't let us go before the end of studio hour, 5:30pm. Then at 6:30pm I had another class started and ended at 9.10 pm. I felt bad that I couldn't pay attention at the last quarter part of the class.

I started my second day, with another grumbling. My locker dissapearred! It was a loose box with my lock attached to it. Unlike my last semester's desk, my current desk doesn't have place to secure my stuffs. So on my first day, while a lot of stuffs in the architecture building was still free for all, I searched for a box, found one and claimed it as mine. That how it works in our building, where the first day determine a lot of things for a semester.

No sane people would move stuffs after the first day, that's way I was so mad. Obviously someone owned it because there was a lock attached to it. Anyway, after coming back from searching the fourth and third floor, I found the box coming back to my studio. My friend told me that it was at the first year studio. Since we are big community that will see each other around, I didn't want to know who stole my box.

It is still the second day, but amount of assignment I got is enough to make me having a headache Hopefully everything will settle up by next week.

Changes

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Wed, 4 Aug 2010 21:15:48 -0400

A lot of things happened this summer. We started the beginning with the hustle and bustle of hubby's finishing his thesis. To make ourself more comfortable while he was finishing his writing, we moved our working area down stair in living room for it was cooler there. We tried to save energy by not turning on the upstair's air conditioner. At that time we didn't see the light at the end of tunnel of his study. I believe this past 3 years he'd gotten tired of answering people's question about when he'd graduated. One international advisor at campus asked me to tell him that he didn't ask when Reuben would graduate

The day finally came. After 26 years been in school non-stop from kindergarten, now he doesn't put "student" under his employment status We had dinner celebration just the two of us the day he defended his thesis. His professors treated us for dinner a week after. We savored that moment. It was more perfect because he got a job offer months before he graduated. We had time when we felt like suddenly having a lot of money Then it came to reality that more income means more spending. We feel that it is time for us to move out from this church's house. The church has been so great to us so far. They don't ask us to move, it is purely our decision. We think this is the best both for us and the church.

After searching several apartments, we have picked one we think works best for us. On the searching process, we realized that we've been so spoiled by all facilities we have at church. Now living in a square room with a lot of neighbors seems to be hard for us. After had our paper work done and went home, I felt so gloomy. Soon I will miss this beautiful house, the yard, the garden, the plants, and the wildlife. We won't make fun of rabbits and chase squirrels any longer. We also have to buy a car for me to go to school. It will be a cheap car that we can afford. We also have to face significant increase of my school tuition. There will be a lot of cutting budget, cutting things that already been cut. I am afraid of changes. Afraid that things get worse. On the other hand, I know that if we know our future then we won't have faith. I cried, I am gloomy and nervous. But, life must go on, we are now jumping to a real world, and despite all of the changes we believe that God will still...hold our back.

Quick Update

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 22:51:04 -0400

One of my prayer had been answered. I got a paid summer internship! Months before last semester ended, I sent email to several landscape architecture companies, and no one responded. Then at the beginning of summer I got interviewed by one company at downtown, but they wasn't sure there's job enough for an intern that needed minimum 160 hours to get credit from the university. I haven't heard back from them. Many companies in this country are struggling because of the economic crisis. Many of them don't want to hire even unpaid intern. I think, since they cut off their employee, they better to use their employee's time for things very useful, and teaching an intern may be not one of those. So, I was filled with excitement when my professor told me that I could work with him doing a cool real project that's goes along with my believe about environment. It was such a blessing...and I get paid! I'll explain what I am doing when I have time.

Today was a long day for me at work since we just had a review with my all three supervisors. We went to study and area that required good distance of hiking; and since we didn't plan on doing it, I wore flip-flops instead of snickers. After we got back to the office, surely enough I got blister on my both feet. After work, I walk to the gym to go swimming, and walking from the agriculture campus to the main campus under the sun with blister on my feet was killing me. I prayed & I got a "yes" answer. As I looked back following a vehicle sound, there run a bus that went through the gym. I hopped in and got free ride to the gym. I didn't even stood at a bus stop, and sometimes the bus driver doesn't want to stop.

Tomorrow is a huge day for hubby. He's been working on his doctorate degree for 8 years, and through that time there seemed to have no ending. It's amazing to count God's blessing and guidance throughout these years. Tomorrow is his defense, and although he's rehearsed his presentation three times, he is still nervous. I asked my family at home to pray for him, and for me too, since I wanted to cook as I promised years before this day - to cook for his defense. I asked prayer that whatever cake I cook it will rise, because sometimes things do not cooperate with me on important moments. Thanks God, two snacks that I made went well as planned. I just need to assemble and arrange them on a serving tray tomorrow morning.

... Month Old

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Wed, 7 Jul 2010 22:44:17 -0400

I asked a young woman how old her daughter was and she answered, "She is 22-month old now". It wasn't the first time I heard someone told their kid's age by month. Often I see my friend's caption on her Facebook picture saying something like "My daughter-30 month old (or young?)". I thought people count age with month only for baby under a year, but apparently that precision is still used way pass kid's first birthday.

As I wondered about this way of counting age, I came up with reasons affected this month-age idea:

- Medical Language
One vaccination schedule online I just read said, "Hepatitis B vaccine - Third dose at 6 to 18 months". It would be harder to write, 6 months to 1 year and 6 months.

- Maternal Love
Most mom treasures their baby since they get pregnant. Soon after they deliver their bundle of joy, every hour counts. Pictures of baby's every move are taken and are labeled with their age. For most mom also, it is a mix feeling to see their baby's fast growing. A feeling that their baby will leave them as they grow up is a fear they feel starts even when their babies can't talk well yet! Counting day by day, month by month then keep continuing counting with month after their babies reach 12 months could be a manifestation of the statement "You will be my baby forever".

- Progression in Society
For me (a person who doesn't have any kid yet), it is easier to picture 2-year-7-month-old kid than 31-month-old kid. The first subject came up to me when I heard about this month-age is Mathematics! I believe this idea continues because people don't seem to be bothered, means they don't have difficulty in simple mathematics.

Why people using month for age isn't clear to me. I won't worry about researching this matter since this is not important after all. What I know for sure is next month I will be 360-month old

...

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Fri, 4 Jun 2010 13:26:40 -0400

Hubby was so excited when he found out that Phil Keaggy, his guitarist hero had concert at one church near Nashville. He'd missed several concerts that was held in 5 hours range from our place because we were busy with school work. This time seems to be a perfect time since it is summer (although I have to miss one class), and it is only 3 hours away. Last time we watched Philly's concert was in Alabama 6 years ago, when I visited him before we got married. At that time, I was surprised that my cool boyfriend who never had idol nor cared about any famous people went wild on the show.

Not as happy as he is, I am happy too with our trip, although it's hard to imagine this day being a historic day in our family history since our grandma get buried this morning. It is hard for not being able to be there sharing love with my family. Part of my heart feel like I am betraying for not coming home and helping a lot of things need to be done related to grandma. Thus, this having fun that hubby has planned as part of our 5th anniversary series seems to be ironic. On the other hand, there's nothing I can do except giving them moral support by calling them and praying for them. How I wish I could go home.

If there is thing that can make me feel helpful for this moment is I found grandma's picture that was used for the funeral. She's been sick for 15 years and there's no occasion needed to get her picture taken. I knew she had great picture when she was young that was hung on her house's wall. It was before she was sick, and since then the house was sold then her stuffs got moved around no one sure where the picture was. I was glad that hubby inventories pictures very very well. When dad mentioned that he was looking for grand's pictures, I didn't have much trouble to find one. I wish there were pictures with her big smile like what she gave to my nieces, but none was on the right angel. I thought what I found weren't good enough because they were cropped images from ground pictures we took when we had gathering. Apparently they were best picture of her we all could find.

I pray for peace and comfort for family and relatives. Soon everyone will go back to their city. Soon they have to face quietness, and quietness is sometimes saddening.

Till We Meet, Grandma

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Thu, 3 Jun 2010 12:34:07 -0400

Dad likes to tell story about his childhood, fun stories about him and his mom. I like to hear those stories and imagining the setting and how grandma looked when she was young, also how my dad looked when he was little. As a young boy, dad loved to accompany her to grocery shopping at traditional market. Unlike me who despite wet market when I was little, dad thought that that was a privilege. He got kopingho comic as a reward. He still has the collections and still adding until now.

She was very beautiful when she was young. I wasn't surprised when people told me that, because I witnessed it myself. One day at war time, she almost got caught by Indonesian troops. They thought she was a dutch. Her skin was smooth pale white, and her eyes were brown. Her deep loving and caring heart amazed me. Having different races, grandpa & grandma's early marriage had to face difficult situation as some of their siblings and their family disagreed with their relationship and disfavored her. All unfortunate circumstances didn't stop her to do great things to everyone even people who hated her. I bet she didn't do that to win their heart, she did it because she has too big heart to share for people in need. The Lord reward her to be the most favorite aunt in the family. She was loved by everyone until the end of her life.

One day when she and mom rode a bus, they met a woman who was really sick. It was way back then, when air conditioning bus was a luxury. This was a regular bus, that could accommodate unlimited people. That woman vomited in the bus (I saw once when I took public transportation when I was little, and that moment haunted me for years. It was revolting). Immediately she took rubbing from her bag and massage that unknown woman's neck. Mom was astonished and can't forget that moment.

Raising 9 kids must have been tough for her. I believe it was tough when they were little, and tougher when some became teenagers while some were still toddlers. Grandpa was an civil engineer that traveled a lot. He was also a strict man that to him his kids gave a lot respect. It was to their mom that their kids find warmth. Hence her role to her kids is very crucial.

She was so independent, never asked help doing what she needed to do. Cell phone would be much appreciated back then, since it was hard to keep tract where she was since she was so mobile and had a lot of missions. So, having stroke for 15 years really broke her heart. Even with all the limitation she has, she still cared and paid attention to people. With difficulty in speaking, she told my uncle that his collar is untidy. She still had perfection despite her situation.

Dad liked to lie down beside her on her bed when we visited her, then my sisters, my niece & I would follow. Dad would tell story about new things happened while checking grandma's blood pressure, mom would sing praise songs, and we would laughed together. It didn't last long, because then she asked mom and dad to help her sit and walk to family room. She wouldn't talk, or talk very little. She would listen to the conversation and laugh at what my little niece' was doing.

My relationship with her wasn't as close as my relationship with my other grandma because she had more than 20 grandkids in different cities and traveled a lot. She also paid more attention to grandkids that has special needs, which indeed need more caring. However she always made the best time out of our limited meeting time. I remember she always treat us meatball, her favorite, and my sister favorite. Whenever we came to her house she always prepared the best food she could offer. It was a great memory.

She is now happy in heaven. Happy that she finally meet her savior. You will always in my heart grandma.........

Funny Hubby

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Sun, 23 May 2010 22:46:56 -0400

Hubby likes to watch Man vs. Wild, while I am kinda disgusted with the survival tricks Bear Grylls shows on the show especially while I am eating. This grossness doesn't seem to bother hubby. It is Bear's skill that he praises.

Anyway. While watching Bear's struggling to survive using limited tools in a very hopeless situation in Namibia, I asked hubby what he would bring if he could only bring 3 things to go to the wild. He said: knife, matches, and KIKKOMAN!

Agritourism: Strawberry Picking

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Mon, 17 May 2010 22:12:59 -0400

Unlike my two previous semesters that focused on urban design and anything urban, last semester the focus of our studio project was on rural development. Before starting to design our actual project, we had to do research then present three topics each person. So the total was 27 for our class. One topic that I got was agritourism. I had heard and known that term long before I researched that topic, yet apparently there are a lot of fact that I had never thought before.

Agritourism is any agriculturally-based operation or activity that brings visitors to a farm or ranch - wikipedia.
Running a farm is not easy and not always financially profitable. That is one reason people sell their farm, because it is more beneficial to invest the money. Most of ex-farmlands are developed to hardscapes or buildings, that if is not designed properly will cause more water run-off, more land pollution, flood, heat island, etc. But some people choose to keep their farm, because it is their family heritage, and it's been part of their life, and they want to make good living to support community's demand out of it. It is small farms, family farms we are talking about, not farm factories that are owned by gigantic companies.

To keep their farm going, the farmers need to have other incomes other than from selling crops. Some popular agritourisms are pick-your-own operation, petting zoo, horseback riding, winery, and corn maze. Agritourism serving as cushion against farm income fluctuation, it is stimulating local economy, and the most important thing, it provides FUN for visitors. I just experienced it last Saturday. Strawberry season is in early May. After going to CSA open farm, I hurried hubby to drive to a berry patch in our city.

It was bright and sunny but not too hot when we got to the main building. I grabbed two empty buckets that soon would be filled with luscious strawberries. While having a little driving to the strawberry field, we passed peach, plum, blueberry, and grape orchard. I will try to remember checking their website so I can come when they are ripe. My eyes widened while looking at the field. Those shiny red fruits were hiding under their thick serrated leaves. I was excited, very excited so hubby's preference to stay and read in the car didn't turn me down. About and hour after, I almost filled up my two buckets. I can't decide which one is more fun, the picking or the eating and baking part.

We got to the main building and scale the strawberries. 7 pounds! (more than 3 kgs). The price isn't necessarily lower than that of grocery store, but pick-your-own and road-side-stand are one of few ways farmers can get fair price. The payment goes directly to the farmers, it support local economy, and you get the freshest fruit ever! I have some plans that use those strawberries, one of my plan is just wash, put in a bowl, and nibble them enjoying their tastiness. Yummm....

Enjoying Grad School

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Sat, 1 May 2010 14:07:15 -0400

Photo courtesy of Papa Sam

Last Wednesday before History class started, one of my friend said that he couldn't wait until next year when we didn't need to worry about all of school work. Another friend of mine corrected, "a year and a week". Yes, it is that sleepless-night time again. Some people will come to studio with their red, watery eyes. Some have their sleeping bag, pillow and blanket in studio, camp out in the building to save traveling time.

That conversation reminded me of my great time in my last semester in college. I was stressed out, complained about my thesis coordinator and many things, but I enjoyed that time so much. Although I admitted it after the last semester ended. During the semester, I just wished I could pass that time and graduate.

This time, I can feel what I felt when I graduated, from college, high school and middle school. I can feel the heart stirring of not being around friends that apparently become a group support for each other. Yup, those feeling that comes after the glory of finishing a degree. Wait! No early sadness now. I still have a year, don't I?

Too Many Biodiversity in the House (Eww...)

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Mon, 12 Apr 2010 20:31:28 -0400

We've been noticing those black ovoid grain-of-rice size unwanted gifts in our kitchen drawers. Our friends warned us that rodent colony must have been hijacked our house, yet we doubted it. There's no suspicious noise, unlike when our house got attacked by mice. Church people set a mouse trap months ago but never caught any. About a month ago, hubby put the same trap and surprisingly got one. Our kitchen was in peace afterward. Until recently, mouse activities had come back to life. Their droppings were everywhere especially in kitchen drawers - place for all of our and the church' kitchen utensils. Thus, we had to wash those hundreds stuffs with hot water.

Got super annoyed, hubby got two a new traps and set them in the drawer. We pull out one drawer that contains cleaned stuffs, stuffs that we use everyday after we finish dinner every night. The other drawers were still unwashed, until our kitchen is mouse free. After putting a drop of peanut butter as a bait, we went upstair hoping to catch two. At night when hubby checked the drawer, there a mouse got trapped and died. He put the other one on the drawer. About an hour after, there was another pity mouse. Gotcha! Like me, he is disgusted of mouse also yet has no choice. Thanks mice, now I feel unsecure for entering my own kitchen.

This morning when I went down getting my cereal, I jumped and screamed. There was a mouse in the sink. Our sink is deep so the mouse couldn't get out. Killing mouse nor taking it out alive wasn't a choice. So hubby dropped a mouse trap that had leftover peanut butter in the sink. It could be fooled. We got one more. Disgusting indeed! After telling my friend about our disgusting experience, my friend told me his experience when he was still living at his old apartment. He was so annoyed with mice, just like we are. Then he put two traps, and caught the total 20! I told hubby about my friend's experience and he said, "So, we have 17 more to go!

Exhausted...=(

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Fri, 9 Apr 2010 21:02:23 -0400

Less than a month before semester ends! I am still far from finishing my projects

This weekend, I have homework for my five classes plus one class that I am TA'ing. Usually on weekend also, I get work for my side job, and have to finish one job for my professor before our weekly meeting on Friday. Can't complaint. My outbreak of activities imply the richness of my life. But, help! how can I squeeze those activities in my limited time. Sometime like this time, my brain is stuffed and my eyes are tired of starring monitor and book. I need to lay down on my couch flipping channel.

Hubby is also in panic mode. He has to finish writing his thesis in ten weeks while his research hasn't finished yet. Poor hubby, I can't feel his pressure of doing both researching and writing. So, it is more likely that we won't do anything fun this summer. Not until he graduates.

School is tiring, but it pays off at the end. I just need to motivate myself to work harder, err...no, smarter. What about both, harder and smarter?

Evangelism?

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Thu, 1 Apr 2010 16:39:24 -0400

It was a beautiful spring day, Winny and I couldn't wait until noon to have our lunch outside. She had PB&J (peanut butter and jelly) day, while I was having a soto day. After she prepared her PB&J and I warmed my food, we headed to the amphitheater - the best spot on campus to have outdoor relaxation. Approaching that place, we saw many people gathered around focusing on 2 or 3 people at the middle bottom part of the theater. Obviously it wasn't a regular spring fever where people laid around reading, chatting or hanging their hammock on the maple trees to take a nap.

Not far from the focus of the crowd, there's a person holding a big banner. Those people in the middle spoke loudly, while people sitting or standing on the amphitheater shouted back repeatedly. The rest of people applauded and cheered when one that they supported could verbally attack the other side. We sat on the amphitheater, opened our lunch and listened to what was going on. People in the middle was a Christian group that was preaching out loud about (at least when we were there) sin/condemnation toward people committed adultery/sex before married. People who shouted back were the other extreme.

I wasn't comfortable sitting there then we moved to another place. There were shouts back and forth about who would go to hell. Obviously that wasn't a pleasant discussion to listen to, and It wasn't because of my atheist friend nor my disagreeing with adultery. But I think that's not what Jesus taught us to do. I recognized one person from that group who always stands on the main pedestrian mall adjacent to the amphitheater. He preaches out loud (close to shouts) to people passing by. I don't see what his purpose was since pedestrian will hear several sentences and I believe most of them wouldn't get the meaning. He likes to have argumentation about what he believes offensively. I admire his courage, but I think there a best way, way that doesn't require "confrontation", judging and shouting. I believe in evangelism that shows love in words and deeds. I believe also that evangelism that is done wisely, will reach people more effectively.

From my stand point, that moment looked like a commotion. It went on until I left studio, about 5 hours from lunch time. Police came watched from afar did not dismiss the crowd. My friend reminded me that it is the United States, a free country where people have freedom to speak.

At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, [a] where are they? Has no one condemned you?"
"No one, sir," she said. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
-John 8:9-11

Joyful Lady

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Sat, 6 Mar 2010 22:35:55 -0500

I heard about this lady for the first time about five years ago. We opened our wedding presents a day after wedding celebration that our church made for us. Then we opened a present with two names I'd never heard before. They were endearing elderly ladies brought color to our church. They were sisters who took care of each other. Their health hindered them from coming to church. The younger one never got married, the older had family. However, two of them lived alone. The younger one took care of her sister wholeheartedly for the rest of her older sister's life. The older sister passed away years ago. Since then the younger sister, Obie moved to a nursing home.

Whenever we carolled on Christmas time to Obie, I could see that she was in joy. Sitting on a wheel chair, she asked one kid to sit on her lap. Hymn sing was her favorite. She would requested some songs, hymns that she used to sing. She sang and showed her bright, content smile. Then, she would ask us to carol to everyone at the nursing home. We would then walk around the corridors with Obie leading in front of us. I could see some people were curious on what was going on, and some muttered the song we were singing.

Last Christmas we went there, she wasn't in a great condition. I wouldn't have known if my friend had not asked, since she showed her usual joyful face. After telling her health problem, she said that it was nothing compare to the joy she will received when she met the Lord, while she had her finger pointed up. She was ready, but in the mean time she used her time to spread her faith and shared her overflow happiness to people on nursing home. I never spend much time with her, but from our short meetings and from people's testimony about her, I could see that she was a very faithful, special and influential lady.

This freezing winter morning, I attended her funeral. A joyful funeral, since finally met her dear older sister. Joyful, since it was a celebration of her meeting Father 'above' there.

Back to School

nospam@example.com (Maudy Indriani) — Sat, 16 Jan 2010 09:14:55 -0500

Yes! I think I've had more than enough rest. However, thinking craziness of school turned me down a bit. I was nervous, as usual.

We were welcomed with pizza for lunch on our first day of school. There are much changes in our department, and we, students were given update for what to expect this semester. I am glad for the changes. Our program is a brand new, yet there's thirty-year preparation behind it. I believe the changes will make it better. On that moment, an excitement filled me. I was glad to be back to school! Besides that, our studio is the same as that of last semester. I loooove my spot. It faces window where I can see a lot of activities down there and old-stone library as a deep foreground. This picture was taken at the end of last semester. At this moment, my desk is still clean, so does the entire studio. Soon it will be packed up with trashing papers, drawings, models, pictures, books, etc. This studio is my second home. Some students will bring sleeping bag, blanket, sofa, electric kettle, microwave and refrigerator. You'll see some unexpected stuffs like hammock, iron, grill, and toaster.

First meetings of class somewhat make my stomach queasy. Now I know the pattern. It's when a professor read the schedule and grading point. I thought I would treat this grad school easily, and wouldn't care much about grade. I thought getting stressed out about not getting good grade is so undergrad and so vain. The more I tried, the more I know my nature But, I still don't get the point of too emphasizing on discussing grading point. Professors will repeat this again in the middle and the end of semester. Moreover, I don't get why people like to calculate what grade they have earn as semester goes on to know how many more they need to get an A. Such a wasting time. I hope they don't miscalculate. I would just do my best.

I've step 'the' conveyor belt - I'll get 'moved' whatever happens. Once I realize, it would be next week, next month month, spring break, Easter, then the end of the semester. I am busy already. Busy with homework, work for my professors, my freelance work & cleaning my house. Like what I said to my friend, I complain a lot, but I enjoy my life